My school is new. Not like brand new, but only a few years old in it's offical CLRG-ness. As such, the TC and her assistant TCs are often rearranging steps, choreographies, ect. Phasing out "old" steps (from our pre-comission days) and putting in new stuff.
Usually, new steps mean I get more confused because out of either muscle-memory or just stupidity, I always revert to doing old steps instead of the new, even though I mentally know the new. Let me sidetrack for a sec here and clue you all into the fact that my treble reel has ALWAYS been rough. I had just started learning it before my 4-year hiatus and it was still shakey. Then I came back and the step was diffrent then how I remembered it - part of that whole "we're offical now" step changing thing.
So, while I was slowly but surely learning all my other hard shoe stuff, that one was just giving me a heck of a time. But then, a miracle happened. This week in class, my teacher decided to phase our first treble reel step into a new one. And I don't know if it's just a fresh start idea - that instead of trying to remember what I already know, I can just learn something new from the begining - or if it's just an easier variation of the step.
It left me with a good feeling after class. That maybe that goal of placing well in my competitions isn't so silly of an idea. And that spark of hope makes me want to work harder. The day after class I spent half an hour at the fitness centre at my complex. I'm staying after at work a little today to use the equipment here. If I can get my stamina up, it will help me be able to push through the form into my steps more. I feel like so often I am so worried about just getting through the step, that I slack. Or worse, I'm so winded after going through the whole first step of whatever that by halfway through the next I'm barely picking my feet up off the floor.
I want more strength too. If that 3 peice home gym weight system wasn't so damn scary and confusing looking, I'd probably use that too.
As it is, we'll see how it goes. I think any progress to that First place is good progress, even if it's small.